3, 2, 1 .. Lift Off !

I notice I have been writing a lot on "touchy" topics. Not good for my mental health. Lets start Monday with some humour, moreover there is a lot of office work that needs to be done, so cannot write an original peice today :(
I have been using one of the four swanky lifts in our new office building everyday for my daily ups-and-downs. Related to the same; here is an old one, but does ticke the nervus ulnaris:

THESE ARE THE THINGS WHICH YOU CAN TRY WHEN YOU ARE INSIDE A LIFT.

~Push the buttons and pretend they give you a shock. Smile, and go back for more.

~Ask if you can push the button for other people, but push the wrong ones.

~Hold the doors open and say you're waiting for your friend. After a while, let the doors close and say, "Hi Greg. How's your day been?"

~Drop a pen and wait until someone reaches to help pick it up, then scream, "That's mine!"

~Bring a camera and take pictures of everyone in the elevator.

~Leave a box in the corner, and when someone gets on ask them if they hear something ticking.

~Pretend you are a flight attendant and review emergency procedures and exits with the passengers.

~Ask, "Did you feel that?"

~Stand really close to someone, sniffing them occasionally.

~When the doors close, announce to the others, "It's okay. Don't panic, they open up again."
~Swat at flies that don't exist.

~Call out, "group hug!", then enforce it.

~Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering, "Shut up, all of you, just shut up!"

~Stand silently and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off.

~Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce in horror, "You're one of THEM!" and back away slowly.

~Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.

~Stare, grinning at another passenger for a while, and then announce, "I have new socks on."

~Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers, "This is my personal space!"